An invited guest asks if they can invite a brother and girlfriend. Is this proper? What do you say?

Lobsterfest, with a jazz band. We are covering cost for lobster, alcohol and entertainment.


Jul 30, 2011
Guests Inviting Guests
by: Wendy (Modern Manners and Etiquette)

Thank you for your question.

It is an interesting situation that a guest would invite others to an event that you are hosting. At least this guest asked you first.

However, it is not proper etiquette to invite other people to an event that you have been invited to. If it was a girlfriend, then checking with the host is acceptable. Being as it is more than one other person, it is not.

Since you are hosting/paying for this event, it is your choice as to whether or not to allow them to bring the extra guests. It is not bad etiquette to say no.

Simply say to this guest that you would love for him/her to be there, however you cannot accommodate the others. The way you say anything is key, so let this guest know in a pleasant way.

The important thing about hosting events such as this is that you and your guests have a good time. It is hard to do this if you are worried about any extra that have put themselves on the tab.

I hope this helps and that you have an enjoyable evening!