Do I have the right to be angry?

by Carrie
(NC)

I remarried 3 years ago and we are attending my Brother's wedding this winter. I just found out that my Ex-Husband has been invited as well! Last year, my Mom invited him to Thanksgiving dinner and didn't see anything wrong with that. I sat her down and explained that she had crossed the line & what she had done was very disrespectful to me & my Husband. I feel it is up to me to do the inviting when it involves our children. My Brother's wedding does not have anything to do with our children and find it very rude that this was done behind my back, knowing how I feel. Do I have the right to feel angry, hurt & disrespected?



Ex-husband invite
by: Wendy (Modern Manners and Etiquette)

Thank you for your question.

It is natural to feel hurt in this situation. You have moved on and would like your family to do so as well.

However, divorce situations are not that easy. Sometimes people would love for the divorce to be cut and dry with all ties being severed. Unfortunately that is not the case here.

It looks like your family has formed a relationship with your ex-husband and would like to continue to include him. You did what you could by explaining your feelings about him coming to Thanksgiving dinner.

How you feel from here on out is your choice. You can feel angry and offended and carry that burden with you, or you can let it go understanding that they are going to do what they feel.

Best wishes.