How much money should I give my stepson for his wedding?

by JONI
(CLINTON MISSOURI)

My husband of 23 years passed away in May. My stepson is getting married. I don't know how much money I should give them. I don't have a lot of money. I have 2 children by my first husband and my husband had 2 by his first and we had 2 together. Please help!

Sept 12, 2011
Stepson's Wedding Gift
by: Wendy (Modern Manners and Etiquette)

Thank you for your question!

I am sorry to hear of the recent passing of your husband. Please accept my condolences.

Congratulations on the upcoming wedding of your stepson. It is a wonderful time to celebrate the new journey of life they are embarking on.

Your question is how much money to give him for his wedding. You mentioned, however, that you do not have a lot of money at this time. This is always a difficult thing, especially at a time such as this.

There are many who would give you a set amount to give to them, no matter what. I am not of that thought process. As much as you love him, there is no reason for you to incur debt for him to start his life.

My thoughts are to give what you can afford. Whatever fits into your budget is what it is. If you would prefer to find a gift for them, then I would find something that, again fits into your budget, and is meaningful for him and his new wife. Sometimes it is easier to find a gift along those lines that will be affordable and meaningful all at the same time.

Heirlooms are a wonderful way to show your love as well. They can be simple items that are treasured always. I received a simple, but beautiful vase for my wedding and I still treasure it because it brings back memories of a loved one.

I hope that this has given you some help. Best wishes!!