is it right for your boyfriend's mom to invite his ex-girlfriend to our baby shower?

My boyfriend's mom wants to invite his ex-girlfriend to our baby shower, I don't think it is right. His sister is also having a wedding and his ex-girlfriend is in the wedding, that kinda bugs me too. Is that bad?


Sep 09, 2011
Mom's crazy
by: Anonymous

I think it is crazy of his mom to invite her to YOUR BABY SHOWER!!!! His sister's wedding is whatever she wants...that would bother anyone, but there's not much you can say. As for your baby shower, stand up to his crazy mother now or your going to have his ex babysitting your kids next!


May 24, 2011
Ex-girlfriend At Family Functions
by: Kevin (Modern Manners and Etiquette)

It is completely understandable that you are uncomfortable with his ex-girlfriend attending the baby shower and the wedding of your boyfriend's sister. It is a very normal emotional feeling to feel defensive when an ex-girlfriend is coming into your territory.

There really is not an easy answer to your question. Your feelings are completely normal and justified.

However, they also have a right to invite the people that they choose to these events. Is it a little tacky on their part? Maybe...they could be a little more understanding of your feelings.

But, you must also be understanding of their feelings as well. They might have had a great relationship with the ex-girlfriend and may wish to maintain a relationship with her. This is likely not a problem that will go away. So, what do you do?

More than anything, you need to be transparent with them when asked. Let them know that is makes you feel uncomfortable so that they understand your feelings. At the same time, it is important to not make a big deal out of the situation.

If you make a big deal out of it, it starts to become "either she goes or I go" type of situation and that isn't healthy for anyone. If they think enough of her to continue to invite her to family functions, you might be at the losing end of that battle. Do your best to keep it normal. You do not need to be her best friend but it is wise to keep it civil. If you like your boyfriend, you will want to have a good relationship with his family and this really could start it off the wrong way.